About Me
Hi, I’m Lex! I’m 29.
Many look at me and assume I’m high or lucky for my awe with details, despite being sober. My rose-tinted approach to life is a conscious choice each day. It’s reconnecting to our deepest aspects.
I’ve come to know that for many, the best we can do for the world is balance our own inner world and soften.
The gift of my upbringing was that it was a crucible, not a safe haven. Something like a war zone. Drawn out emotional explosions, psych warfare, threats, intimidation, violence, shame, fear. What lingered in the spaces was just enough carbon monoxide to feel like suffocation but never enough to bring relief.
Naturally, it lead constant high alert & profound depression. Eventually meditation taught me how to calm the inner storm. But the root pain still hummed. Cue the most abusive romantic bond.
This was the ultimate blessing in disguise. It brought me to the brink of death and forced me to begin healing to the crux of my being — facing the darkest corners of my mind and loving them gently.
THE GIFT IS ALCHEMY.
I’ve seen how softness can coexist with sacred boundaries to honor ourselves without closing off. I’ve seen how we can burst our pains into flowers like rust into diamonds. & I choose to do so—to sharpen my focus on light precisely because of the darkness in the world.
Why “Alwynkai” ?
Through the lens of Alwynkai, I aim to capture the essence of nourishment through enchantment and childlike wonder — emphasizing how moments can be felt when we allow ourselves to fall in love with unseen details.
to me, childlike wonder is “soul reconnection.” It is separate to “childish,” which comes from a lack of self-trust.
Merging the names of my cat, Alwyn, symbolizing magical wisdom, and my dog, Kai, the "keeper of keys" and restoration, Alwynkai reflects a journey of reconnection.
Trust Yourself
Nature is the ideal guide. We can look to its symbolism as we traverse the ups and downs of our lives. Just as nature operates in balance and continual unraveling and regeneration, so too can we play with life like putty, trusting that despite any lingering doubts we will always make it to where we need to go.
So why not awe at the details in between?